From the back seat of my car, I heard the request.
Turn the air up!
It was an early June afternoon, and several people were piled in my car for a short drive.
But apparently, some parts of my sedan were unbearable. And those sitting behind me were growing restless.
I tried to alleviate the situation.
I’ve got the air up to full-blast, I told them.
Well, we can’t feel a thing, they replied.
I realized then that I had a major problem. It seemed my car’s air conditioning system was fried, just in time for a sweltering Texas summer.
A few days later, as I tried to price out repair costs in my head, I called my father for advice. He recommended that I buy a new car.
No way, I replied. I don’t have $20,000 sitting around.
My father chuckled and replied that I could finance the car by making monthly payments for several years. Somehow, I had made it through early adulthood without figuring this out.
I soon traded in my sedan for a brand new SUV. In doing so, I upgraded my ride without fundamentally disrupting my lifestyle. The only change was that a little more money came out of my monthly wages to go toward car payments.
Best of all, I wouldn’t hear the sharp critiques from backseat passengers anymore. The SUV was spacious, comfortable, and air-conditioned for all.
I adored my new vehicle from the moment I drove it off the lot.
And yet, as the monthly payments came due, a disconcerting question crossed my mind. Was this purchase a want or a need?
A need is something we rely on. We can’t function without it.
A want is what provides our sense of identity. We feel as if we can’t function without it.
The difference might seem subtle. It’s anything but.
Needs are at the center of humanity. They’re the bedrock that our well-being requires.
Wants, on the other hand, are less universal. They’re highly variable,
The psychologist Abraham Maslow is perhaps most responsible for demonstrating the discrepancy between wants and needs. He created a pyramid heuristic to separate what’s essential for many from what’s important to a few.
Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs starts with basic needs, such as nourishment and shelter, and moves on up to self-fulfillment. Each level gets more intricate, but one can only reach it by first attaining the levels beneath.
I’m not sure where Maslow would put air-conditioned vehicles on the pyramid. Air conditioning was still a new technology when his theory was published in 1943. Cars and trucks were also less ubiquitous than they are now.
But I would say a functional vehicle counts as a basic need. Or at least it is in Texas, where the distances are vast, sidewalks are sporadic, and alternative transportation options are often nonexistent. (No, most of us do not ride our horses to work.)
That said, my shiny new SUV might have been more of a want than a need. My old sedan was still drivable, air conditioning be darned. And I could have paid less to fix it up than I ultimately spent to get a whole new vehicle.
This distinction is important because the monthly payments made me even more reliant on my income. Not only would I need to maintain my job to pay my rent and cover my bills, but I would also need my salary to stay on time with my car payments.
These expenses were now a fact of my life. But when I peeled back the curtain, I found that only some of these were covering necessities. The others were covering luxuries.
I’ve been peeling back the curtain a lot recently. We all have.
This past year of life in a pandemic has had all of us assessing what’s truly important. It has us looking hard at what’s a want and what’s a need.
Some false necessities were badly exposed. Business travel, gym memberships, and out-of-home entertainment, for instance. Other perceived necessities, such as new car expenses, were suddenly viewed in a new light.
Beyond reconsidering the items we once thought essential, we rethought the way we budget for items. And sometimes, we’ve even pondered whether we needed to at all.
This too, was brought on by the situation at hand. After all, those who lost their jobs during the pandemic didn’t have the means to cover extra expenses. And with so many activities restricted by health and safety protocols, those fortunate enough to keep their jobs parked more money in savings accounts.
Such shifts have led us to take a fresh look at livable wage standards. As millions of people reduced their spending, many have learned that the salary they need to survive is less than what they’d once imagined.
I will admit that this latest revelation has shaken me.
For I still have hopes and dreams. I still have goals that this pandemic has not quashed. I still have plans to build on what I’ve attained and to open myself to more opportunities.
All of this is what I want. But now, I wonder how of it is what I need.
Give an inch, and they’ll take a mile.
This advice serves as a warning shot for a tough negotiation. And it’s relatively commonplace in America.
After all, we are a capitalist society. We are a culture that encourages constituents to claim what’s theirs. And then to take, and take, and take some more.
Yes, our nation has a legacy of excess. We have a long history of spoiling ourselves with riches while simultaneously depleting the spaces we share with others.
There has been a growing backlash against this pattern in recent years. But old habits die hard.
It took a drastic event — this pandemic — for many of us to break the chain. To start to think of our objectives in a more wholesome way.
But now comes the challenge of moving beyond. Of separating our needs from our wants. And of seeing where to draw the line.
Reconciling what we desire with what we should rightfully seek is no easy task. For in our minds, everything is important. From our perspective, we’ve already sacrificed so much. Why should we be asked to sacrifice even more?
But if we are to grow beyond this strange and scarring moment, we must carry its lessons forward. We must cut down on the excess before it is cut down for us. We must prioritize our needs over our wants.
I plan on doing just that.
My SUV is paid off now, and I’m holding off on trading it in for a new one. The air conditioning works, and the vehicle still drives well. No need to put more weight on my income just to get a shinier ride.
Unlike that June day from years ago, I have what I need. The wants can wait.