Everyone talks about the American Dream. Of envisioning it. Of striving for it. Of living it.
The American Dream is the gold standard upon which our lives are calibrated. But I’m not on board with this mythology.
Dreams, you see, are illusions. Half-formed fantasies that remain out of grasp. Idealistic tropes that never had the structure and substance to be tangible in the first place.
So, no. I’m not living the American Dream. My journey is that of the American Reality.
I’ve had far more struggles than triumphs, but I have experienced both extremes. I’ve worked harder to maintain what I’ve got than I had to attain it in the first place – par for the course in a world where someone always has a hand in your pocket. I’ve exhausted myself — physically, mentally, and emotionally — more times than I can count, without ever getting that expended energy back. I’ve shed blood, sweat, and tears in my endeavors. And ultimately, I’ve had precious little to show for any of it.
I’ve fought uphill time and again. And I will persist in this venture until my heart stops beating.
These are the realities of my American life. Unsatisfying, unpleasant, but oh so true.
Through it all, I’ve been told that I should be grateful. That my problems are first-world problems. That there are others abroad struggling for food, shelter, or safety whose strife is more noteworthy.
I recognize the motivation behind this perspective, but I also believe that these two worlds are not compatible. The challenge I face – that so many of us face – as Americans are less existential than those found abroad. But they still carry a toll. And they deserve more credence than we dare to provide.
Freedom is a real concept. There’s no doubt about that. But it’s not absolute.
Freedom comes with strings attached. Strings that are more like weighted belts. Wishing away those strings – or worse, hiding our ongoing tussle with them from others – does more than set an unreasonable bar of false hope to reach for. It degrades the validity of what life in America is for so many of us.
So, let’s stop waxing poetic about the American Dream. Let’s stop grasping for a golden illusion at the expense of the reality in our midst.
We deserve better than to degrade our lived experience. We deserve the truth.