A cloud lifted.
This is the sensation we often feel when we can avoid making a decision our heart’s not fully invested in.
That decision often comes as we prepare to enter into a commitment that’s unfamiliar and scary.
It could be heading off to college, signing a mortgage, or committing to a new job.
Regardless of which type of tough decision we face, we react the same when we turn and walk away.
We feel as if the cloud has been lifted. We feel relief.
Relief is soothing. Relief is reassuring. And relief is extremely dangerous.
You see, there’s a misgiving embedded in relief. One that makes us believe we were right to run from our tough decisions or unpleasant commitments. One that says those choices were wrong for us, and that we provided our own salvation from them.
In essence, we treat relief as a White Knight. As the sensible way forward in a world of unpleasantness and confusion.
But this elevation of purpose is all kinds of wrong.
You see, relief is no savior. No, it’s actually a mirage.
Much like visions of water in the desert, it’s a reaction to our own hopes and dreams.
These hopes, these dreams — they’re heavily biased by our desires and fears. As such, they’re hardly objective at all.
Treating them as the voice of righteousness is like building a house of cards. They’re bound to come crashing down.
The truth is as follows: What makes us feel good isn’t always right. Sometimes, what’s difficult is what’s needed.
Think about it. What are we trading off for walking away? What is the price of comfort and uninterrupted happiness?
That price is the potential for something greater.
By playing it safe and letting our sense of relief win the day, we sacrifice our ability to grow and prosper. We cede the opportunity to make mistakes and learn from them. We give up the chance to live at the edge of our comfort zone.
There’s nothing admirable in that.
Now, that’s not to say that walking away is the always the wrong thing to do.
There are no absolutes here. The choices we make are heavily impacted by our temperament, along with the specific situations we face.
Some of these situations may carry a heavy toll for walking away. Others might not.
But regardless, when we do decide to balk, we must not mistake relief for validation.
Instead, we must take the time to exhale and move forward. All while disposing of all in-the-moment sensations.
For if we do not do this, we will cloud our judgement for future decisions. We will continue to champion what’s comfortable over what’s most beneficial.
And should we do that, we’ll be hurting ourselves. And ruining our potential.
So, find solace in relief. But beware of the mirage.
Illusions can cut deeper than the sharpest dagger.