A Better Resolution

A new year is upon us. The changing of a digit on the year field was, once again, strangely a cause for celebration, indulgence and clichéd Year In Review lists. But once the confetti cleared and the hangovers lifted, something far worse took over our collective consciousness — those dreaded New Years Resolutions.

If you can’t tell, I’m not exactly a big fan of New Year’s. I mostly view it as a clerical holiday mixed with too much drinking, something we arbitrarily celebrate to inflate our own importance. In the natural order of the universe, it’s quite strange for billions of people to go nuts and drink champagne at a certain point of a random winter’s night. But because we’ve standardized our calendar to stop at a certain point, we’re convinced that something different has happened once it does.

Which leads me to those damn resolutions. Since we’ve deluded ourselves into thinking that something magical happens when the clock hits midnight on New Year’s Eve, we collectively decide to make broad changes at that time — whether that’s losing weight, saving money or being nicer to others.

But here’s the thing: Arbitrarily making resolutions simply because it’s a new year is selfish.

Don’t believe me? Well take a step back and think about what the impetus for some of those resolutions are? A weight loss resolution is often a reaction to holiday overindulgence, or a single-minded quest look good in a swimsuit in the summer. A resolution to save money is similarly inward-focused; we’re more likely to use that money to buy more things for ourselves than to help those in need. And if you have to make an arbitrary resolution to be a nicer person, well, shame on you.

These resolutions don’t really have much of an impact on the lives of those around us. They just make us feel better when we look in the mirror — or at least make us feel less guilty.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with self-improvement. But the start of a new year shouldn’t be the driving force behind it. For one thing, our heart is likely not spearheading these changes. For another, it’s harder to stay accountable when you’re doing something because a calendar told you to.

This is a big reason why none of my self-improvement initiatives have started in January. I started working out regularly two and a half years ago, and I’ve yet to go a week without at least 10 minutes on the treadmill since. I gave up McDonalds 18 months ago and haven’t set foot in a Golden Arches, Burger King or Wendys since then. And my last sip of soda was three months ago. All three decisions came from the heart — not an arbitrary date on the calendar. Because of that, I’ve remained committed to them.

So as this year continues, I urge you to make resolutions. I urge you to seek changes that make your life better and improve the lives of those around you. But most of all, I urge you to only take up these resolutions when your heart is fully committed to them.

Happy New Year.

Our Most Important Attribute

The most important measure of a person is the size of their heart.

Think about it.

The heart is where compassion, empathy, selflessness and love flow. When we express these feelings towards others, we build a positive community and make the world a better place.

Yes, the brain is important. And there are other body parts that all have their importance as well.

But I’ll take someone with a big heart over all of that.

One of my favorite movies of all time is Forrest Gump, for that very reason. Forrest is a man with a subpar IQ, but a heart that’s off the charts.

And we see that heart on display constantly. When Charlie ambushes his platoon in Vietnam, Forrest risks his life time and again to retrieve his wounded comrades. When his shrimp boat business takes off, he insists on giving Bubba’s mother her full share. Forrest never gives up on Lieutenant Dan or Jenny, even when others do.

It’s because of all of these actions that Forrest’s line late in the movie — “I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is.” — has such great resonance. So simple, but so poignant; Forrest has proved this point throughout his life.

We should all strive to be like Forrest Gump. To share our heart with others and positively impact their lives. For it will not only positively affect our lives in return, but it will also change the world.

During this season full of friends, family and faith, ask yourself one question:

How big can my heart be?